Max and Mary's wedding sermon

Uwala-Mary and Max – Thank you for inviting us all to share with today with you. It is a deep honor to be here with you.

Presiding Bishop Michael Curry has been known to say that if what you’re doing, if what you’re saying, if what you’re believing isn’t about Love, it isn’t about God. Looking at the two of you, today is absolutely about God, because it is unquestionably about Love. 

The readings too are all about love. From Genesis, we hear that man leaves his mother and father and embraces his wife and becomes one. That is love In Ephesians, the prayer is that you, being rooted in love may have the power to know how deep and wide and long and high Christ’s love is. Max read that man has committed that he is taking the woman out of honest integrity, or in other translations, sincere love.

Uwala-Mary reminded us all that if we don’t have love, we don’t have anything. We can be generous, kind, prophetic, and even have faith to move mountains, but without love, it is nothing. Love.

The Gospel reading is packed full of love language. God loves Christ, Christ loves us, and we are commanded to love each other.

And the miracle of your marriage? It is a way we can all see what that illogical love looks like. Your marriage is a visible sign to everyone of God’s love in this world, so on behalf of everyone who is bolstered by your love, thank you.

You two are choosing to make a life-time commitment to each other, to create a new family – the Uwala-Mary and Max family. You’re busy, independent rational people, and getting married is a sign of a love that defies all of that. And yet here we are. We are here because you two are so rooted in and flooded by God’s love, that it’s spilling over. First to each other, and there’s so much, it’s filling us all too.

God’s love is unwarranted, unearned, illogical, unending. God is so big and incomprehensible it’s hard to understand God’s love. So God became human in Jesus, and through Jesus, we got a foretaste of what God’s love actually looks like. Jesus loved everyone, despite language and nation, despite religion or tradition. He was hospitable to strangers and “sinners”. Through Jesus, we were able to see what love looks like, to see what God looks like.

So what makes a good marriage? I’ll give you a hint. It’s the word of the day. Love. Uwala-Mary told us about some of the key attributes of love. I think they’re primarily describing God’s love, or since God is love, they are describing God. But if you model your relationship after that, you’re solid.

Love is patient, love is kind. God will wait for us as long as it takes to learn whatever it is we’re supposed to. God will not seek revenge. God will wait for us to return for the tenth or 100th time to God’s love. In your relationship, be patient and kind, like God’s love. Wait for the other one who’s late. Don’t assume bad intentions. Do the kind, surprising thing. Hold hands. Laugh often.

Love does not envy, does not boast, is not proud. Love is not self seeking, easily angered, and it does not keep score of who’s wrong. God is not jealous of how we spend our time, even when we spend it away from God. Do not be envious of each other, of each other’s skills or strengths, or friends. Be honest, and don’t get angry.

Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes and always perseveres. How awesome is it that we have a god who is all of that. And how awesome that love, your love, is that. Try never to go to bed angry. Always say I love you at least once a day, and assume the best of each other. Always. If you aim to do these things, to be these things, your relationship – rooted in God’s love, will be spectacular.

I can’t think of a better way to conclude than to repeat the lyrics of the first song from today. The Lord bless you and keep you. May God’s favor be upon you, and your family and your children and their children and their children.

Amen

[Mary's mother, from Sierra Leone calls Mary by her birth name, Uwala, hence the hyphenated first name]