May 7 2019 1 John 4: 7-21

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear; for fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not reached perfection in love.

No fear in love. That’s big. We all have fears. Some fears are about ourselves, some about others we know and love, and some fears are about systems or nations or planets. If I were to inventory my soul, I generally have fear for loved ones, which is caused by fear for their worlds, and caused by the systems they’re in and  sometimes creates a related fear for myself. 

My sick loved one is doing better in the hospital, not great, but better. Their sense of reality appears closer to mine, but only on the edges. I worry about what will happen to them long term. I worry about their future, and how it will likely be very different than any of us imagined. I fear for the system that’s trying to help, and challenged by their funding, and the illness itself. All of that makes me fear for my future in this. Not only is my loved one’s future different than imagined, so is mine. 

So to read that there is no fear in love, is both a lovely, much-needed vision, and sounds a little laughable. That’s my humanity laughing, my cynicism, and fear itself. My fears this morning could be translated into whatever I was fearing a year ago, or 10 years ago. The subject causing fear doesn’t matter. Context doesn’t matter. Fear is fear. And I think a lot of fear is caused by our lack of control and lack of certainty, and change of plans, regardless of the cause or context. 

This morning I’m thinking about how to get ahead of that laughing doubt and cynicism that causes and relishes fear. And while the answer is God’s perfect love of and in us, what does that look like in practice?  For fear about my world and my life, that’s probably easiest for me to wrap my head around. I believe God has this, regardless of how my current situation changes, it’s in God’s hands and will be fine.. Regardless.. If I stop and think about why I’m worried about changes in my world, it’s relatively easy to put God between me and that fear. 

When I think about loved ones and systems, it’s a little tougher. Maybe that’s because it’s easy for me to come to that place that personally, I cannot do anything further in my world, to control my circumstances. That place is further away when others are involved; I have this sense that there’s more I could/should do, more they could/should do. And that creates fear. Instead, I probably just need to admit that just like me, God has them too.. Regardless.. 

This morning, I’m grateful for the persistent reminder that it’s not my job. I’m not the savior. I can’t construct or reconstruct the ending I’ve imagined. God’s got this. And in the end, all shall be well. Regardless..