Do not say, “I will do to others as they have done to me; I will pay them back for what they have done.”
I remember very well the argument I had with my mom. She was trying to teach me the Golden Rule. And I genuinely thought this was it. Do unto others as they have done unto you. I kept arguing that this was absolutely what I was doing! Someone did something mean to me, so I did it back. Golden rule. Easy.
I could not fathom a rule that didn’t take into account the grievances I had against my enemy. Of course I should do to them what they did to me. In hindsight, I wasn’t actually arguing, as much as I just didn’t understand and couldn’t fathom such a rule.
And here we read it, plain as day. Do not say “I will do to others as they have done to me”. Hmm. It’s so counter intuitive, so against human nature. And even though as an adult, I know the how the rule is supposed to be, it’s so tough to do consistently and universally.
And yet, it’s clearly how we’re supposed to behave. No caveats or exceptions. No exception for dropping bombs, for capital punishment, for violent protests or counterprotests, for defacing someone else’s property by spraying ACAB on it, no caveats. Treat others like you’d like to be treated.
How much easier would it be if we could refer to our cosmic scoresheet, and repay people what they’ve done to us! Of course, we might get it wrong, or over estimate what they’ve done to us, and then they do the same thing, and so on, and so on. Next thing you know, we’re in a war.
For me the bigger problem is that the Golden Rule is easy for me to remember, except when it’s not. I’m pretty good at forgiving, and being nice to others, except when I get pissy and forget. Yesterday, our loved one returned from over two weeks in the hospital. They desperately want to be independent, and yet aren’t quite. They’re actually very needy. I want to be a kind helper, assisting this sick person as they get back on their feet. I want to treat them with the kind of love they deserve. And it’s hard not to repay unkind acts with unkind acts. Or testy retorts with testy retorts.
How much more peaceful the whole world would be if we could just treat people like we want to be treated. We could deescalate all sorts of things, from our home disagreements to community strife. I’d even suggest we could bring nations to peace, if we all treated others like we wanted to be treated. That might sound lofty, but the idealist in me needs to believe this is true.
This morning, I’m thinking about the especially hard circumstances where I need to treat others as I’d want to be treated.
I remember very well the argument I had with my mom. She was trying to teach me the Golden Rule. And I genuinely thought this was it. Do unto others as they have done unto you. I kept arguing that this was absolutely what I was doing! Someone did something mean to me, so I did it back. Golden rule. Easy.
I could not fathom a rule that didn’t take into account the grievances I had against my enemy. Of course I should do to them what they did to me. In hindsight, I wasn’t actually arguing, as much as I just didn’t understand and couldn’t fathom such a rule.
And here we read it, plain as day. Do not say “I will do to others as they have done to me”. Hmm. It’s so counter intuitive, so against human nature. And even though as an adult, I know the how the rule is supposed to be, it’s so tough to do consistently and universally.
And yet, it’s clearly how we’re supposed to behave. No caveats or exceptions. No exception for dropping bombs, for capital punishment, for violent protests or counterprotests, for defacing someone else’s property by spraying ACAB on it, no caveats. Treat others like you’d like to be treated.
How much easier would it be if we could refer to our cosmic scoresheet, and repay people what they’ve done to us! Of course, we might get it wrong, or over estimate what they’ve done to us, and then they do the same thing, and so on, and so on. Next thing you know, we’re in a war.
For me the bigger problem is that the Golden Rule is easy for me to remember, except when it’s not. I’m pretty good at forgiving, and being nice to others, except when I get pissy and forget. Yesterday, our loved one returned from over two weeks in the hospital. They desperately want to be independent, and yet aren’t quite. They’re actually very needy. I want to be a kind helper, assisting this sick person as they get back on their feet. I want to treat them with the kind of love they deserve. And it’s hard not to repay unkind acts with unkind acts. Or testy retorts with testy retorts.
How much more peaceful the whole world would be if we could just treat people like we want to be treated. We could deescalate all sorts of things, from our home disagreements to community strife. I’d even suggest we could bring nations to peace, if we all treated others like we wanted to be treated. That might sound lofty, but the idealist in me needs to believe this is true.
This morning, I’m thinking about the especially hard circumstances where I need to treat others as I’d want to be treated.
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