Very truly, I tell you, before the cock crows, you will have denied me three times.
Good Friday. A somber day, when Christians everywhere ponder what humanity did, and still does to Christ. In this reading Peter tells Jesus that he’d like to follow him wherever Jesus goes. Jesus response is that Peter cannot now. Peter responds that he’d lay down his life for Jesus. No, Jesus assures him, that before morning dawns, Peter will deny Jesus three times.
And it is true. Peter does deny knowing Jesus so he’s not found guilty by association. But what is also true is that Peter does lay down his life for Jesus after all. So why couldn’t he follow Jesus when he originally asked?
Maybe Jesus was giving Peter a chance to finish up all of his earthly impetuousness and humanity. Even after saying this, that he’d lay down his life, Peter denied him three times. And Peter abandoned him at the cross. But after Jesus died and was risen, he appeared to Peter three times, with the question, Peter do you love me? Peter responds increasingly frustrated, . Lord you know that I love you. Then feed my sheep.
This morning, I’m thinking about the trials we need to go to in order to be followers – genuine, to our core, followers. Like Peter, I’ve thought that I could follow anywhere. Like Peter, I’ve abandoned Christ, both the Christ in me and the Christ in fellow humans. And maybe, like Peter, I need to be asked – after that abandonment, do you love me.
Maybe like Peter, it’s a cycle. I have a desire to do good and follow Jesus. I deny his presence and place in my life. I watch him suffer and be killed. I have remorse and repent. Jesus again asks me if I love him. I do. Feed my sheep. Year after year, this cycle is repeated as I live through Good Friday. Day after day, this cycle is repeated as I live through my life. Today, it feels big, and hard. Today, I’m feeling fatigue from the repeated Good Fridays of my life. Today, I need to remember it’s a persistent cycle, and Easter will come once again.
No comments:
Post a Comment