Feb 26 Day 28 Leviticus 5:1–7:38

When any of you sin and commit a trespass against the LORD by deceiving a neighbor . . .

This section of Leviticus is all about sin and guilt offerings. In their times, the offerings involved oxen and doves. But although that is vastly different, the underlying offering is the same. We need to come to God acknowledging where we’ve sinned, and to try – yet again – to do better next time.

The accompanying reflection is from Frederick Buechner who writes, “We come here to acknowledge that in terms of the best we could be we are lost and that we are helpless to save ourselves. We come here to confess our sins”.

In my tradition, we include a collective confession of sin at every service including the daily morning and evening prayer offices. In the opening poignant line, it covers all of the ways I sin. I confess that I have sinned against you, in thought, word and deed; things done and things left undone.

In what I think, what I say and what I do. And not only what I do, but in what I don’t do that I should have. Every day, several times a day, I sin. Maybe they’re not huge sins, but they’re slights, or unkind thoughts. Or withheld love from others or myself.

This confession of sin is not designed to be like a scourge, or something to beat myself up with. Rather, it’s a way of constantly searching my thoughts, words and deeds, and acknowledging to myself and God that I get it wrong. But I’ve got no chance of ever getting it right if I don’t know what went wrong.

As it turns out, my little failings are pretty consistent over time. Apparently, I’m a slow learner, because although I’ve always had certain flaws, I’ve acknowledged them, I’ve confessed, I still do what I don’t want to do, or don’t do what I want to do. But God knows those flaws and loves me anyway.

Later today, I will be taking my loved one to a doctor’s appointment. The last time we went, they didn’t want to be in an elevator with anyone else, so it took a long time to get up to the ninth floor. And I’m never sure about their outward behaviors. One of my recurring challenges is to overlook snarky, rude or embarrassing comments to me or others. Without thinking, I react as if this were someone not dealing with a persistent, significant mental illness. Things never go well, when I do that.

Today, I’m thinking about being really intentionally careful during our outing. If I fall into my particular recurring sin, I’m thinking about adding in evening prayer into my daily discipline. I fear I’ll need another confession by 5:00.